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| - My Next Life by Woody Allen\n\nIn my next life I want to live backwards.\nYou start out dead and get that out of the way.\n\nThen you wake up in an old people's home feeling better every day.\n\nYou get kicked out for being too healthy, go collect your pension, and then when you start work, you get a gold watch and a party on your first day.\n\nYou work for 40 years until you're young enough to enjoy your retirement.\n\nYou party, drink alcohol, and are generally promiscuous, then you are ready for high school.\n\nYou then go to primary school, you become a kid, you play.\nYou have no responsibilities, you become a baby until you are born. \nAnd then you spend your last 9 months floating in luxurious spa like conditions with central heating and room service on tap, larger quarters every day\nand then, Voila!\nYou finish off as an orgasm!\n\nI rest my case.
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